little gems from professor swensen

while studying for my modern art final, i keep coming across the funniest little quotes from my professor.  here are a few of my favorite:

[while discussing duchamp's fountain] "why do we always come back to this... plumbing!?"

"who wants to listen to marie osmond perform this?"

"if [an art work] creates a big stink, buy it, folks."

"just talking about pavlov [as in pavlov's dog], how many of you are getting a good build up of saliva? i am, and i wonder what that says about my psychology."

[after saying he's not going to let us out early] "i can see you're all pained, and that's the perfect time to turn the knife."

while discussing nazi art, he called me liesel.

"there's no sexier way to start off class than to talk about fascism."

"there's nothing more mexican than [a really long name.]"

"not a bad day dumpster diving."

"but cows don't have rows of teets, megan."

"he didn't die of a tragic, sad way.  he died of cancer... wait..."

yeah, that's good ol' art history for ya.

another week, another weekend

sorry guys.  i feel like i'm only blogging after the weekend... don't know why.  i guess college life is a lot more boring than when i lived at home.

this weekend wasn't too exciting.

friday: i walked around campus looking legit and taking pictures of autumn.  trammel, jen and i went up to sandy for chipotle.  (it was like my second time having it, but dang, it's good stuff).  then trammel's roommates bennett and tanner joined us at our apartment to make sugar cookies.  i showed them this and then this.  their other roommate alec came over with his bud jordan.  then kye joined us.  we just hung out and stuff.  it was a blast.  pictures below.

saturday:  the football game.  i'm not a huge "Y" fan, but i like going and hanging out with friends. oh, and we were on the front row.  right behind the end zone.  say what? afterwards, we stayed and volunteered to help a buddy clean up the stadium.  gross, gross, gross.  people are gross.  i will never leave anything (half eaten or not) behind at a stadium.  yuck.  then, i took a shower, ignored the two miler i was supposed to do, and went on to study german. (yuck) photos below.

sunday: a much needed extra hour of sleep thanks to the end of day lights savings. church.  a desire to bake resulting in a no-bake peanut butter/chocolate/oat bar.  watching chitty chitty bang bang with friends and eating all of said no-bake delight.

monday: (yea, i know it's not the weekend, but whatever)  rain, which made me miss home- rainy ol' london.  grocery shopping thanks to urges to bake all sorts of things (peanut brittle, pepermint bark, cinammon rolls).  i swear it was bring "attractive man shopping day".  i saw at least twenty VERY good looking men today.  dang.  if only i had put on make up.

image from here

i have this struggle every day.

a little mid-week, almost done with school pick-me-up

so, i just got sick- a super nasty cold complete with runny nose, congestion headaches and problems breathing.  joy.  on top of that i have to move out this week, take my VERY big final that will determine my physical science grade.  in a nutshell, it is a stressful time.

here are some images that i found that work great as a pick-me-up.

a nerdy confession from here

fun loving twiggy from here

how i eat nutella from here

an adorable cup of bunny from here

puppy kisses from here

what looks like a fun camping trip from here

i want a hedgehog! from here

a great reminder from here

for some reason, this photo reminds me of little red riding hood.  from here

the definition of pants

let me start by saying what pants aren't:  leggings, tights or sweaters. yes, i said sweaters.  i know you're thinking that i'm crazy, but i'm not half as crazy as these people:

yes, these people are wearing sweaters as legwear.  this photo is for real.. what is this world coming to?

image from here.

Bored?

bored? want to solve world hunger?  want to improve your knowledge of vocabulary, art, a language, etc?  then maybe you should head on over to free rice.  it's a really amusing website that will donate rice while you play games.  it's really simple.  just go check it out.  also, look here for FAQs to find out what you're doing... it's really fun.  so far, i donated 4030 4100 grains of rice, just by looking at paintings and choosing the correct artist.  i learn and save people! win win!

seriously.  check it out.

art + music = genius

i just saw this music video and i can nearly name every art work used.  the music is pretty good, too.

enjoy!


70 Million by Hold Your Horses ! from L'Ogre on Vimeo.

he he

british chav - excuse the language:

Watching this makes me laugh.

ha ha ha!

TREND ALERT: Domestic Violence

I just read this article, mocking Twilight. (If you are going to read it, i caution you: there are a couple of f-bombs. beware.) If you don't want to read it, I'll just summarize it for you. Basically, Twilight promotes domestic violence. You may think it's crazy, but it isn't. The love interests in Bella's life are violent. Edward throws her across a room. Jacob has no control over his temper. He even talks about it. If you want more details, read the article. It, despite being funny, also brings up some really good points. There is a weird trend of domestic violence... thank you Chris Brown.

(I got this article at the same place where I got the previous Twilight article.)

CAUTION: Long Post

so, i decided that in order to mock Twilight without being hypocritical, i would first have to see it. so i gave in and watched it.

here's what i thought:
- acting= terrible. i can't STAND stewart's voice. anyone else want to duct tape her mouth shut? she sounds like a bad lindsay lohan.
- music= pretty good. except i thought "flightless bird, american mouth" was a poor choice for the end. yes, it's a pretty song, but it's also about political disillusionment in america... not quite a love song...
- story= weak. (someone would've had to have to book for it to make sense.)
- dialog= sometimes i laughed aloud, when i wasn't supposed to.
- cinematography= indifferent. wasn't bothered either way.
- special effects= ...special.
OVERALL: hmmm... not the best use of my time.

i read this on in an article, found here. i thought it was pretty funny.

"I have provided a little cheat sheet for adults who might want to see Twilight New Moon this weekend for some reason, but who don't want to actually sit through the unbearable two hours that is Twilight Old Moon.

• Teenage vampires travel from high school to high school pretending to be incestuous siblings, because that is just a smart cover story.
• Teenage vampires always sit in a semi-circle around their cafeteria lunch table facing away from each other, it just makes it easier to give everyone "[screw] me" eyes.
• Vampires know just where to find rays of sunlight in an otherwise gray forest, FACT.
• When you transfer to a new school, it will somehow be prom right away.
• Vampires of all ages love to play Vampire Lightning Baseball.
• Although vampires can hit baseballs very, very far, the outfielders must remain at a regulation distance from home plate during every at-bat, and then run fast into the woods to find the ball.
• If you're a bad vampire, wearing shirts is optional.
• It only takes two hours to drive from coastal Washington to Phoenix, Arizona.
• Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) can read everyone's mind except Bella Swan's (Kristen Stewart)--perhaps a "she is clinically brain dead" twist in future episodes?
• Werewolves used to be really awkward and goofy looking when we didn't know they were werewolves, but then werewolves put on 30 pounds of muscle and somehow that also fixed the werewolves' face?
• Vampires cannot go out in the sun because their skin sparkles and everyone will know they are vampires (or extras in a Lady Gaga video), but vampires CAN live in giant glass houses that let in as much sunlight as possible, no problem.
• Vampires never go surfing because surfing belongs to the werewolves.
• In a town of 3,000, you know that at least eight of them are going to be rapists, and they are all going to try and rape you together.
  
• Vampires drive their hybrid cars like Vin Diesel drives his dinner trays.
• You can throw off a Tracker Vampire by rubbing a hoodie on a tree.
• There are Tracker Vampires.
• Some vampires have psychic visions that can only be transcribed in charcoal drawings, you just never know, different vampires have different powers, sometimes, apparently.
• If you are a bad vampire who hangs out in a crew of bad vampires, and one of those bad vampires is black and has dreadlocks, watch out for him, because he will betray you for no reason, right away.
• Although in times of distress it would probably be faster for vampires to use their superspeed to get away, sometimes they just like to drive!
• Sometimes vampires have venom and sometimes they don't?
• If you are a good vampire and you are about to kill a bad vampire, you should try and restrain yourself and remember that you are a good vampire. The easiest way to do this is by letting other good vampires kill the bad vampire.
• Going back to Vampire Lightning Baseball for a second: it is important to wear a non-denominational "baseball" hat in a way that makes you look like a special needs child.
• Werewolf dads are very concerned with whether or not their human friends' daughters are dating teenage vampires, and will pay their teenage werewolves human money to try and break up these relationships that have nothing to do with them."

if you like mocking Twilight (or at least the first movie), read the article. it's pretty funny.

Meepers?

Gymnastics a la giraffe, originally uploaded by Wild Dogger.

Odd title. Odd subject matter. Today is already an odd day. I slept in for one- never do that. Anyways, on with the story....

A few years ago, my lovely, but kinda crazy sister Laura, wanted to mess up the lives of our nieces and nephew. Is there a better way to do that than teach them something totally crazy? No. She taught them that giraffes say "Meepers." Yes. Meepers.

Now it's a huge joke in my family. My father dear, LOVES to say "meepers." He says it in this really pathetic, baby giraffe voice. It's really cute. I call him "Papa Meeps" now. I how my children call his "G'ampa Meeps."

Crazy family jokes.

Do you have any weird family jokes?